Thursday, February 24, 2011

Leukemia; Not one of my 2011 Resolutions!

Leukemia wasn’t one of my New Year’s Resolution, nor was it on my “to do” list. As a matter of fact, it is really screwing with my “to do” list! Leukemia came to me as a surprise; it snuck into my body and has set up shop. It seems as though it is here to stay, so I must learn to accept the fact that I will be living and dancing with cancer.

I keep looking in the mirror and saying, “I have Leukemia”, “I have cancer” and the person looking back at me keeps saying, “That’s impossible”, “It just can’t be”, “I’ve got way too much to do”. Maybe living in a state of quasi denial is a good thing, I am not sure! Don’t get me wrong, I know that it is true; I am doing everything that my doctor tells me and am researching like crazy!
I must admit that I am more tired than usual and I have to keep reminding myself that this is my “normal” for right now. Resting has never been one of my finer attributes. It is so difficult when you heart and brain say GO! And your body says NO!

Of course I spend a fair amount of time wondering and pondering just what all of this means. I am sure that there is a lesson here and I really want to learn it quickly. I keep saying to the guy upstairs, “Could you please speak louder and clearer, because I’m not hearing you….yet!” It is amazing to me just how quickly life can change. I’ve been privy to it before and I am now privy to it again. Just how does one wake up with Leukemia?

Feel free to join me on my journey, Dancing My Way Through Leukemia.

4 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing your story. I know it is very difficult I search the internet from time to time trying to find answers to my questions regarding CML. Also I think you must be a very strong person to be able to creat this Blog. My experience with CML we found it very difficult to talk about it. Maybe we thought if we did not talk about it maybe it did'nt exist. Talk about denial. Thanks again. Take care and god bless you on you journey Dancing with Leukemia.

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  2. Thanks for stopping by. Yes, the lack of information is really frustrating! I want long term info, but since these drugs are relatively new there is little long term info available.

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  3. Found u after searching for answers to RA flare after Levaquin. How r u...did u take Gleevac? http://marrow.org/Patient/Disease_and_Treatment/About_Your_Disease/CML/Gleevec.aspx

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  4. Hi Lynnelee,
    Thanks for stopping by; sorry you had to find me after a bad bout with Levaquinn! No, I have never taken Gleevec, I was put on Sprycel from the beginning.
    Cipro was actually much worse than the Sprycel! It has been 2 1/2 years since my last dose and I was able to wear a pair of boots the other day for the very first time, so, I guess I am finally getting better!
    Floroquinolones are BAD news!
    Here is a link to my Cipro Poisoning blog: http://www.cipro-poisoning.com/2010/04/beware-of-antibiotic-cipro.html

    Hope you are doing better,
    Michele

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Bricks for the Brave!!